I’ve been on a roller-coaster ride since the latter part of 2016. I guess it’s just fitting that my birthday this year is like a roller-coaster ride, too. Heck, it’s the day after my birthday, and I’ve ridden a roller coaster of emotions the entire morning until noontime. :aargh: I hate my job. Sometimes.

As I reflect on how the year has been, I realized that everything that has happened to me particularly in the last two months comes with a lesson. That being, to borrow a line from a certain phenomenal star, not everyone who approaches you is true to you. I had to learn it the hard way, but I guess lessons like that really must be applied harshly to get the maximum effect.

The great thing is, I learned in the past few days/weeks that despite the growing number of people who seemed to have learned to dislike me, there are also more people who love and care for me regardless of who I am and what I have become, with some of them I haven’t even been in touch with for the longest time. They’re just there, waiting to welcome me with open arms. All I got to do is holler.

And to those who judged me, well… I can’t do anything about that. I say what I say and do what I do and I take full responsibility for it. Your understanding and perception of what I do or say is all yours.

===

Since I celebrated my birthday by being, once again, a trending topic on socmed because I took a selfie with Alden in public :rolleyes: I just want to say a few things before I end this blog entry:

1. I’ve never talked about it openly since I didn’t feel the need to, ie. until recently: I am no longer a part of any Alden Richards fan club. I haven’t been one since the latter part of May 2017. I now fangirl on my own.

2. Since we’re on the subject, I’d also like to clarify that I was NOT, and never have been, a founder or main admin of any Alden Richards fan club. I am merely a member who was always designated as the ‘on-camera talent’ since none of the other FC members wanted their faces to be publicized. As this round face of mine has been on camera before in my previous fandoms, I am sort of the default choice. So again, quit referring to me as that person who formed that FC for whatever purpose.

3. And while we’re on the subject, may I just ask: why do some people keep on looking for me at Alden United? I am not, and never have been, a part of AU. :shrug: Don’t look for me at any fan club, for that matter. I personally know, and are still friends with people from different FCs, but I am no longer a member of any of it.

4. If anyone thinks that those nasty comments that were posted on IG about me yesterday made me mad or sad, well sorry guys. :lol: I haven’t laughed like that for the longest time, and that comment thread was my source of entertainment during my long travel time to and from work yesterday. :lmao: So I guess I owe those people for keeping me amused?

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I had a great Sunday.

It was one of those days where everything was just surreal, but really nice. I can’t share exactly what happened, for many reasons, but it was wonderful.

And then a few people attempted to spoil that wonderful day which diverted my focus from it.

I didn’t fully appreciate how wonderful that Sunday was until two days later, when I was getting bored on the commute to and from work. I killed time by recalling the events one by one, and realized how much I wasted it by allowing myself to get affected by those negative forces.

So many terrible things have been happening in the world lately. It’s getting more and more difficult to stay positive that those little happy things that we usually take for granted become more and more precious.

I am taking this as a lesson in life. If something good happens to you, never, ever take it for granted. Treasure and appreciate anything that makes you happy, no matter how big or small it was.

And never waste a precious moment by letting other people’s bitterness ruin it for you.

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My 2016 can be summed up by this photo:

At my year-end post last year, I had wondered how much closer will I get to Alden Richards come 2016. At the time, I was only wondering if I’ll get to attend more events and hopefully take more photos with him, and not necessarily solo.

Ironically, less than a month after I posted that blog, I posted a rant about the state of his fandom.

And then another month after that… I transitioned. Actually, the whole Alden fandom transitioned. Alden International came along and things were never the same again.

2016 was one big roller coaster ride. There were so many high points, and quite a number of low ones. It came to a point that I barely posted blogs, not because I got lazy/lost my drive like last year, but because I got pushed into a fandom that relentlessly destroys anyone who has a opinion that does not fit their own. Even if it’s on something as legit as wanting more substantial projects for our idols. Say something like that, and you’re dead meat.

It irks me that in this fandom, you are not allowed to have a mind of your own. You simply can’t just do your thing. Someone is just watching from the sidelines, waiting to pounce at even the smallest mistake that anyone will make. This fandom has so many geniuses. They can manipulate the nation by making them hate anyone whom they will decide as The Enemy, even if that someone is not doing anything wrong. Pag nakainggitan ka, humanda ka na. :phew:

It got so tiring. Exhausting, actually. I got to a point where I wanted to give Alden up. A week will not pass where I didn’t utter the words, “ayoko na” (I give up) to people I confide with. I even declared to my FC admins, “tatapusin ko lang ang mga commitments natin hanggang end of the year. Pagkatapos nito, ayoko na. Lalayo na ako.”

Alden International is a small, quiet group that got even smaller and quieter. But however small we are, this bunch can surely be relied on when it comes to giving their full support to Alden. We may not be the type that are always visible wherever Alden is (ironically, I am being tagged by bashers as “laging nakabuntot” – always tagging along – when I’m hardly present in most of his events and I can count my close encounters with one hand) but we show our support where it matters most. We’re just here, on the sidelines, cheering him on.

That above paragraph was supposed to be my speech at the Joint Thanksgiving Party last December 27. Not exactly in those words, but along those lines. However, it seems the universe didn’t want me to give up. When the one you’re supporting tells you himself not to give in to bashers and that he believes in you, who am I to say NO to that?

I don’t know how much uglier it will become in 2017. I just know that I’m here to stay. Alden Richards is here to stay. You bitter fools will just have to swallow that. :blink:

Have a great 2017, everyone! :soju:

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Today, October 17th, marks the anniversary of my being an active supporter of Alden Richards.

Exactly one year ago, I plucked myself out of fangirl retirement to attend the launching of Alden’s Wish I May album. It was my first time to see him in the flesh, and also the first of many of his events that I covered for this blog and the fan clubs that I belong(ed) to. At the time, I never thought that things would come this far. In fact, I came across this post of mine on Facebook about my experience at the WIM launch that had me shaking my head and laughing in amusement. I was just looking for my group photo from the event, but when I saw the caption, I just had to immortalize the entire thing:

wishimaylaunch

Note to my non-Filipino readers: basically, I was just telling on the caption that one day, I will have a photo where I’ll be beside Alden.

One year later, I attended the launch of his next album, and here’s what happened:

sayitagainlaunch

Yup, hindi ko pa rin siya katabi. Ang saklap. :cry:

So many things had happened to me this past year that I sometimes wonder if it’s just an ongoing dream. Last year, all I wanted was just to see him in person. All I wanted was just to take his photos in (relative) peace. One year later, I had exclusive access to some of his events; I’ve had one too many selfies beside him, with him; he already knows who I am and can even spot me from a distance, in the middle of a maddening crowd (me thinks it has something to do with my shiny forehead); I have random strangers on social media who hate me with a passion for no apparent reason (at least, at the Rain fandom, I know exactly why they hate me); and I’ve been branded so many names, from a delusional fangirl who has ‘hidden desires’ towards Alden (uh, excuse me, my desires towards him aren’t hidden; he knows exactly what I want from him, and that is to take his photos without having to battle it out with the crowd), to being branded an “OSF”, or One-Sided Fan. Which is not exactly a bad thing in the strict sense, but not to certain people in this fandom where OSF is synonymous to “basher of the other half of the loveteam.” :kilay: By the way, I still don’t get why I’m being automatically branded an A-OSF when there’s no clear evidence that I’ve bashed Maine on social media and on this blog. Unless you count the random critiques that I sometimes make, but criticism does not equate to bashing (unless you’re a super-sensitive fanatic who regard your idol as a god) and I do that to ANYONE, even my idols. Then again, even if I write lengthily about it, they’d stop at “A-OSF” and “basher ni Maine” and totally disregard the rest of the paragraph, so whatever.

Anyway, I digress.

One year of following Alden has allowed me to witness not just what kind of artist Alden is but also what kind of a person he is. He is pretty much the same in front of the camera and behind it, except he is 10000x more makulit off-cam. :wacky: Everything that I’ve written on this blog about Alden is a testament to his kindness, humility and sincerity. I am looking forward to the next days, months, years of documenting his journey.

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Aftermath: Cadbury Joy Ride with Alden Richards
23 September 2016 – UP Ayala Technohub

I was supposed to write about The Dawn’s 30th Anniversary gig, but I guess that has to take a backseat. Again.

cadbury

I thought this would just be another one of those usual fangirling days. I’d go to an event, take photos, hope that Alden spots me in the crowd… that sort of thing. It did rain, though, which has always been a guaranteed sign for us at Alden International: When it rains, we’ll get an Alden moment. (I wonder how we’re going to manage when dry season comes? Tag-tuyot din sa moment? Wag naman po. :pray: ) I am not ashamed to say that the rain gave me hope that maybe I’ll get more than the usual ‘Ate Pau!’ thing.

I did everything that Cadbury required the attendees to do: I registered at their Facebook page; I arrived early at the venue, lined up and registered my name and cellphone number; I bought the required purchase to be eligible for the Meet and Greet, which I didn’t mind at all because, hello! Cadbury Dairy Milk!

And then I waited some more. Alone.

At 6:41pm, I received the following text message:

cadbury-winner

My jaw dropped. I wanted to scream and hug someone to share my joy, but I was alone at the time. There were other fans, but they don’t know me – or maybe not – and there’s a slight possibility that some of those who were there hated me with a passion, if they knew that the fat girl that’s hogging the front of the stage was Agent P. :phew: What I did, instead, was to screengrab the SMS and posted it on Facebook. And while I was doing that, my hands were shaking and I was barely able to contain my excitement. :hihihi: Which was totally hilarious, because a meet and greet with Alden Richards is nothing new to me – heck, the latest one was just last Tuesday – yet I was acting as if I’ll be meeting him for the first time. :oops: I think my AI friends can relate, though. We have talked numerous times about how seeing Alden in person always feels like it’s the first time. I think even if we see him every day (which we don’t), the excitement level will always the same.

I had intended to use my Huawei P9+ phone because I wanted to road-test the camera, which was why I positioned myself near the stage so that there’ll be no need for zoom lens. But the Meet and Greet winners were asked to lined up on the side so I had to leave my prized spot. Alden arrived at the venue, and he actually passed in front of me but since I was acting like a total newbie, I totally forgot to take footage. :slaphead: He was quickly covered by the crowd of much taller people some of whom were even standing on chairs. :aargh: Then I remembered that I brought Changi, the 40x zoom camera, with me. I whipped it out and tried to take pics of Alden singing Akin Ka Na Lang.

Operative word: TRIED.

cadbury-crowd

AARGH. :aargh:

While I was trying to stretch-and-tip-toe my way through the crowd, someone tapped my arm. It was Mama Ten. :hihihi:

After one song came the Meet and Greet. The great thing about Cadbury’s Meet and Greet is that (1) they allowed us to use our own cameras/phones; and (2) it was a SOLO pic with Alden. How blessed was I? It’s my first time to win something from this fandom, and I got this one. :cheer: After just a few minutes came my turn for the selfie, and Alden greeted me with…

“Ate Pau, pawis na pawis ka na naman!” (Ate Pau, you’re sweating so much again!)

Ok, not exactly what I was expecting, pero may ‘Ate Pau!’ moment naman so kebs.

I really hate it that I almost always looked like someone dumped a bucket of water over my head whenever Alden sees me. But what can I do when the most perspired part of my body is my head?

So anyway, TMI. :hihihi: Here’s our lovely selfie:

cadbury-selfie

:drool:

This is my cue to rave about Huawei P9+’s camera. Yep, the one with Leica lenses. I only used the front cam here, and it looked like I took this pic using either GD-TOP (DSLR) or Boojie (mirrorless). :whoa: Imagine what the rear camera can do! I totally did not make a mistake when I got this phone.

After the quick Meet and Greet, Alden has left the building, er, the venue. It took a while before I got off my high from this totally unexpected, yet amazing experience. What am I saying, I’m still feeling high now. Which is why it’s almost 3:00am and I’m still blogging about it.

On my ride home, this was posted on the window beside me:

uvexpressposter

Pretty much sums up my night. :thumbup:

===

I really didn’t want to spoil this blog entry by saying something that might ruin it, but I just want to get something off my chest.

Lately, my group has been on the receiving end of nasty snide comments even if we weren’t saying or doing anything controversial, or even substantial. Some people just want to spew and sow hatred on us for reasons known only to them. I get that they always feast on ampalaya on a daily basis and we basically can’t do anything about that, but let me just throw this one out there.

I don’t understand why whenever Alden’s fans express how PROUD and HAPPY we are of his achievements, we had to take crap from some people. I really don’t get it. Bakit parang bawal matuwa para sa kanya?

Nagtatanong lang po.

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