Do I still need to put a link on this? The news is everywhere. Song Joong Ki and Song Hye Kyo are getting married this October. :clap:

And my poor BiKyo heart doesn’t feel bad at all. :hihihi: I mean, I’ve already made my peace when Rain got married early this year. Having Hye Kyo married, too – and to a man I “approve” of, no less (duh, as if they need the fans’ approval :lol: ) – is just the icing on the cake, so to speak.

Yeah, yeah, I do seem to remember that in my review of Descendants of the Sun, I mentioned that I only got buddy vibes from SJK and SHK. I guess it’s because I was on cautious mode then, having been badly burned by BiKyo. I tried my very best never to ship any onscreen couple since then. Yes, that includes AlDub, for which I am thankful now that I didn’t fully immerse myself in that pairing. I would’ve been a total nutter by now if I did.

Anyway, I digress.

Because practically all of my BiKyo friends have become KiKyo shippers after DoTS, I’ve been constantly updated with the latest happenings on Song-Song behind the scenes even if I’ve been out of touch with Korean entertainment these past two years. I should say that today’s big news came to no surprise to me when it broke this morning. We’ve been monitoring the events since the Bali issue and we sorta have seen it coming. We just didn’t expect it to be this abrupt.

It’s just so amusing that Rain and Hye Kyo had to get married (to different people) on the same year. Way to bookend the BiKyo Journey, guys. :thumbup:

Congratulations and best wishes to the most beautiful couple I’ve ever seen. :dream:

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It’s been a while since I last wrote a commentary or reaction about things that interest me. Two reasons: (1) no time – surprise! I’m actually busy with real life, for a change. :lol: (2) I kinda enjoyed the relative peace and quiet I got from hibernating away from social media.

It took one topic that REALLY ticked me off for me to get out of hibernation. See, that’s the one thing about me. I get all pumped out to write when I’m pissed. :evil:

I haven’t religiously watched Eat Bulaga’s Juan For All (J4A) segment for the longest time. (Do I still need to explain why?) Nowadays, I only watch EB for Music Hero and Pinoy Henyo, and Broadway Boys on Saturdays, and whenever Baste is onscreen. The rest of the time, I only get to see bits and pieces of it. The June 24, 2017 episode of J4A was one of the rare times that I got to sit down and watch it in its entirety. I guess there was a reason for that, and I know now why.

At that episode, Alden Richards told a story about his shenanigans as a 16-year old boy living in that barangay where they were at for J4A. The gist is that, he stole money from his grandma – Php10,000 in total – which he used to pay for the school bus and to treat his friends at school. He admitted it to his Lola Linda when he was questioned about the missing money (they were the only two people living in their house at the time, so there’s no other suspect but him), which led him to being deported back to their hometown in Laguna.

As I was watching it, I admittedly felt that he will be bashed for telling that story. I mean, this is a person who gets bashed for things he did not even do. That shouldn’t come as a surprise.

When I checked for reactions on socmed regarding that episode, I was pleasantly surprised that save for the ‘usual suspects’ on Twitter and Instagram, EB’s regular viewers who posted comments on their official Facebook page basically did not care so much about him telling that story. Majority were more concerned about the continued absence of Jose Manalo from the show. :err: The few ones who did comment about that part even applauded him for telling this embarrassing story on National TV because it only proved that Alden, perfect as he may seem, is just human like the rest of us. They completely got the point.

It is utterly and completely disappointing that the PR arm of Alden’s home network are the ones who did not get the point. :nono:

The one I posted here is the latest Tweet/article regarding this topic. GMA’s official socmed account posted a similar Tweet and article yesterday that basically tackles on the ‘stealing’ part and did not stress Alden’s point: that what he did as an adolescent was not right and he was punished for it, so don’t emulate what he did. They totally missed the opportunity to impart the lesson behind the story. They composed a Tweet that’s just for clickbait without considering its effects on the image of their own contract artist. And to tell you frankly, posting stuff like that when they’re the artist’s official PR arm only gave more ammunition for his bashers to malign him. Thanks to that Tweet, Alden is now officially known to his bashers as a kleptomaniac. :hopeless:

Their Twitter admin deleted the tweet, but I guess they’re not done being a PR nightmare yet because just moments ago, they Tweeted that thing I posted above which sounded even worse than the one they posted on Saturday. :hmf:

Seriously, GMA-7. Why are you doing this to your most prized talent? Is he too “nice” for you (which, in PR speak, somewhat equates to being boring) that you just had to create trouble for him to be more click-baitable? It’s unbelievable that what was supposed to be Alden’s main defenders became the ones who handed out the bullets for his bashers to shoot him some more. Tsk tsk. :hopeless:

===

Here’s my take regarding Alden and his ‘kupit’ story:

So it turned out, my idol isn’t perfect. Surprise! He’s a normal person who makes mistakes, after all. :P

Seriously, though. Stealing isn’t right. It never was, never is. But what matters more for me is, did he learn a lesson from the mistakes he committed nine, ten years ago? Did he do anything to correct it? What kind of a person he is NOW?

I’ll leave those questions for you, my readers, to answer for yourselves.

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I’ve just renewed this blog’s webspace and domain for another two years. Yeah, I know I hardly ever post lately and it would save me lots of money if I just retire it. For some reason – force of habit, maybe – I still chose to renew it.

Now I know why.

For years, I’ve used this blog to unload my thoughts and feelings about anything under the sun. At least, that’s how it used to be. Nowadays, I say something – STOP. I say and do NOTHING, and I still get judged. :shrug: I know I sound incredibly pa-victim by saying that, but hell. If I can’t say exactly what I’m feeling right this moment on my own blog, where else can I say it? If you’re annoyed that I’m being a drama queen, feel free to go somewhere else.

True confession: In my more than two decades of being an active supporter of quite a number of artists, I have never shed as many tears as I am now. You could combine my years of being a fan of Ricky Martin, The Dawn and Rain – a period that spans many, many years – and the times I spent alone bawling my eyes out would not compare to the nearly two years that I’ve cried in this current fandom. You know why? Because in those many, many years that I have been a fan of those artists, I can freely speak my mind without being harshly judged. In those many, many years, something stupid happens and we’d just laugh it all off, or rant about it together.

Nowadays, I do something or even absolutely NOTHING, and people would either avoid me like the plague or keep silent out of fear of being bashed, or join in the collective bashing even if they have no idea exactly what did I do, if at all. I am the type of person who would either scream her head off, or bawl her eyes out. Without an outlet to unload my feelings, I am reduced to just wallowing in my own self-pity. Boo-hoo.

The other night, I ended the day by being annoyed that people are once again making a big issue out of absolutely nothing. I really don’t get it; there was nothing wrong with that Tweet – for the record, I didn’t write nor post that one; I don’t handle any of our group’s social media accounts – yet some people are reacting as if we killed someone. I shrugged it off and got some much needed sleep instead.

I woke up the following morning to a dressing down about that Tweet. I didn’t get it, neither. In my opinion, there was nothing wrong with it. Evidently, the only thing wrong with it is that it was posted at the wrong time. Read: everyone was dying with kilig, and we didn’t join in the bandwagon. Basag trip, ‘ika nga. :rolleyes: What the hell, really.

So I just went on with my usual business for the day, away from all the fandom madness. Then I stumbled upon an email notification and discovered that apparently, I am in the middle of being maligned on socmed because of that Tweet. As in people are specifically tagging me and calling me all sorts of names because of it. I am automatically tagged as the culprit for something that, while I don’t disagree with because there was nothing wrong with it, I did not do. I was proclaimed guilty by association.

Everything just makes me really, REALLY sad, disappointed and just plain exhausted. I don’t know what exactly did I do to deserve this. It’s like being his fan is a sin and I should take all the punishment because I supported him too much. Far too much for their own liking, anyway. Ironically, I am currently on fan-from-a-distance mode. Believe it or not, the last time I actually got anywhere within a 10-ft radius from the guy was way back in January. Yet I still get all the crap even if I unwillingly chose to be hardly visible lately. Tapos magtataka pa sila bakit ako nawala. Tingin n’yo, bakit kaya?

I don’t regret any of the things I did for this fandom. It’s my choice and I have to live with it. Pero minsan nagtatanong na talaga ako sa sarili ko kung bakit parang ang martir (tanga?) ko na. And that’s not a good sign.

I’d probably regret writing this piece later but I feel that if I don’t, I might regret it more. If I continue to remain silent, I’ll develop this resentment and hatred for probably the wrong reasons or towards the wrong people. It’s funny because in the past, I really didn’t care who gets offended as long as I get things out of my chest. I guess it comes with age.

Sorry for rambling. Then again, why should I apologize. It’s my blog, I can say whatever the hell I want. Self-pity is the only thing working for me right now.

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And so it has come to this.

For the past year and a half, I have tried to be as silent as possible. Those who have known me all this time know that being silent is something that is so un-AgentP. I have always been opinionated. I have always been vocal about my views on anything that interests me. I never cared about ruffling feathers. I never back down on an argument, even those that are pointless and offensive.

Being part of this current fandom that I’m in has changed me. I wasn’t lying nor embellishing when I said that being a fan of this artist I’m currently supporting has inspired me (and a lot others) to become a good person. Since I became active in this fandom, I have always considered “him” and “them” before I open my mouth. Sure, there were times when I said things that are ‘controversial’, but then in those times, it became controversial because “they” decided it was controversial. Whoever “they” were. :neutral:

There were times when I was just speaking my mind. But in speaking my mind, I forgot that I belong in a universe – a nation, if you will – where speaking one’s mind is only allowed if you agree with what they want you to think and say. I forgot that I belong in a fandom where one can easily twist your words and make it appear that you’re the one at fault, or worse, present an imaginary situation as fact. I forgot that social media is a very powerful medium that it only takes one influential person to make you look bad in the eyes of the entire virtual world.

It’s funny how much I “discovered” about myself in the past 24 hours. Through social media, I discovered things that I don’t remember doing or saying. I apparently was in places where I never went to; for example, I found out through social media that I was at Alden’s birthday celebration last year and he joked about my bulging tummy. Upon reading that, I doubted myself and actually tried to recall where I was at Alden’s birthday last year. :lmao: Then I realized that Alden doesn’t even know who I am on January 2, 2016, much less joke about my bulging tummy.

I found out through a comment that I Tweeted something offensive last Sunday and quickly deleted it. It’s funny because I stopped going to Twitter since… I don’t even remember when. :shrug: I just use Twitter to cross-post my blog and Instagram feed. I don’t even remember my Twitter password anymore. :hihihi:

I was accused of doing nothing but ask for video greets, hugs and kisses. For the record, I only asked Alden for a video greet a grand total of three times: once, for one of our admins on her birthday because we were in Singapore and there’s no one else to do that for her; and twice, for a certain fanmily that I belonged to but they’re now reduced to throwing shades at me on socmed for reasons only they know. :rolleyes: As for the hugs and kisses… uhm, none of you will probably believe me so just ask Alden himself if I ever asked that from him. I can only remember one time: at HKIA, because if I won’t hug him I’ll collapse right there at the airport.

The people who posted those comments sounded so sure of themselves that even I started questioning myself if I did those things. It’s hilarious and terrifying at the same time.

I really don’t need to explain myself. I just mentioned those instances to demonstrate how much of what is being told about me right now on social media are LIES and MANIPULATION. Don’t worry, guys, I understand. You were told to hate me, so you did. That’s how this fandom rolls.

And since that’s how this fandom rolls, I decided to leave.

I had mentioned on my year-end blog that I am here to stay, regardless of what everyone thinks of me. But there’s a limit to everything and I have reached my limit. It’s one thing to throw nasty comments towards me. I can accept anyone who maligns my physical attributes (because when logic fails, try throwing a personal insult), or accusations of me having hidden desires towards Alden (hahaha!), or even insults toward my photography skills (because, really, even I am not convinced that I’m good at taking photos). But when a few people decided to include my friend’s 10-year old daughter in this madness, I got scared. Not for myself, but for my family. See, this is the type of monsters this fandom has. They are not contented with just destroying the person. They will destroy everything he or she has, including his/her family, his livelihood, his personal life. This fandom will not hesitate at crossing lines that shouldn’t be crossed only to show their so-called power.

I was once a part of them, when it was all about the love and good vibes. Nowadays it’s just all about ruthlessness, about power-tripping, about behaving like monsters just to prove that they should not be underestimated.

I refuse to be part of this heartless fandom.

Masyadong mahaba na ang panahong naibigay ko para sa ibang tao. Panahon na siguro para isipin ko naman ang sarili ko. For the safety of my family, friends and my well-being, it’s better for me to stay away.

RJ, alam kong sinabi kong hindi ako bibitiw sa ‘yo. Hindi ako bumitaw. Hinabaan ko lang ang tali. I wish you well and I hope, sometime in the future, we’ll bump into each other again.

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Today, October 17th, marks the anniversary of my being an active supporter of Alden Richards.

Exactly one year ago, I plucked myself out of fangirl retirement to attend the launching of Alden’s Wish I May album. It was my first time to see him in the flesh, and also the first of many of his events that I covered for this blog and the fan clubs that I belong(ed) to. At the time, I never thought that things would come this far. In fact, I came across this post of mine on Facebook about my experience at the WIM launch that had me shaking my head and laughing in amusement. I was just looking for my group photo from the event, but when I saw the caption, I just had to immortalize the entire thing:

wishimaylaunch

Note to my non-Filipino readers: basically, I was just telling on the caption that one day, I will have a photo where I’ll be beside Alden.

One year later, I attended the launch of his next album, and here’s what happened:

sayitagainlaunch

Yup, hindi ko pa rin siya katabi. Ang saklap. :cry:

So many things had happened to me this past year that I sometimes wonder if it’s just an ongoing dream. Last year, all I wanted was just to see him in person. All I wanted was just to take his photos in (relative) peace. One year later, I had exclusive access to some of his events; I’ve had one too many selfies beside him, with him; he already knows who I am and can even spot me from a distance, in the middle of a maddening crowd (me thinks it has something to do with my shiny forehead); I have random strangers on social media who hate me with a passion for no apparent reason (at least, at the Rain fandom, I know exactly why they hate me); and I’ve been branded so many names, from a delusional fangirl who has ‘hidden desires’ towards Alden (uh, excuse me, my desires towards him aren’t hidden; he knows exactly what I want from him, and that is to take his photos without having to battle it out with the crowd), to being branded an “OSF”, or One-Sided Fan. Which is not exactly a bad thing in the strict sense, but not to certain people in this fandom where OSF is synonymous to “basher of the other half of the loveteam.” :kilay: By the way, I still don’t get why I’m being automatically branded an A-OSF when there’s no clear evidence that I’ve bashed Maine on social media and on this blog. Unless you count the random critiques that I sometimes make, but criticism does not equate to bashing (unless you’re a super-sensitive fanatic who regard your idol as a god) and I do that to ANYONE, even my idols. Then again, even if I write lengthily about it, they’d stop at “A-OSF” and “basher ni Maine” and totally disregard the rest of the paragraph, so whatever.

Anyway, I digress.

One year of following Alden has allowed me to witness not just what kind of artist Alden is but also what kind of a person he is. He is pretty much the same in front of the camera and behind it, except he is 10000x more makulit off-cam. :wacky: Everything that I’ve written on this blog about Alden is a testament to his kindness, humility and sincerity. I am looking forward to the next days, months, years of documenting his journey.

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