I am now at a point when I’m questioning the clarity of my own words.

Some of you may have noticed how my social media and even my blog posts have been scarce. Only my Instagram has been active because I don’t really need to post words on it. Facebook is another story altogether; I’ve learned to restrict access to my Facebook posts even from some people whom I’ve known personally but don’t really trust (eg., work people :phew: ). The reason for this is, these past few weeks, my words have been twisted so much to the point that I, myself, have wondered if I actually said those things which they say that I said. :shrug:

I’m not even mad. I’m actually amazed at their impeccable story-telling skills. :clap: Manipulating multitudes of people is a talent, you know. A very useful talent in the age of social media.

Funny how it’s easy for anonymous and semi-anonymous netizens to spin webs of lies upon lies until those lies become truths in the eyes of those who just believe them without bothering to check the actual facts. Total strangers would act as if they know you from head to toe when in fact you’ve never even interacted on social media, much more in person. And people buy their version of the truth, for reasons only they know.

I don’t know which one’s worse. The person feeding the lies, or the ones who lap them up without question.

Those who know me from way back are probably really surprised at the current version of Agent P. I am one who never walks away from bashers. I would always defend myself, especially when I know I’m right. I guess maturity came with age (sorry, “maturity” because I still act like a child most of the time :lol: ). That, or someone’s voice keeps ringing in my head every time I get bashed on social media.

That voice tells me, “Ate Pau, huwag mo na lang silang pansinin.” (Ate Pau, just ignore them.)

That statement will become my mantra while I am on this fandom. Unless there is a dire need to unleash the beast inside me. :evil:


Aftermath: “Trenta” The Dawn’s 30th Anniversary Concert
17 September 2016 – Craft Bar and Grill, The Fort

Agent P’s note: This is more than a week late, but I feel that I still have to write about it. :smile:

On bandstalker mode tonight. 🀘🎀🎸🎹🎢 #TheDawn #OPM #PinoyRock #Legends @thedawnph

A photo posted by Paulette Agent P (@agent_pau) on

It’s been more than eleven years since I last saw The Dawn. For five years, I was their No. 1 Stalker. I carry that title with pride. :hihihi: Heck, they’re the reason why this blog’s domain name is ‘bandstalker.com’ (most probably to the consternation of real band stalkers whom I literally snatched this domain name from under their noses). For those who admire my photography skills (if you could call that ‘skills’), you have this band to thank for. I learned the ropes from five years of my close proximity to them.

This is why when they announced their 30th Anniversary gig, I immediately decided that I *must* be there. For old times’ sake. Fortunately, my brother-slash-bandstalking-partner is still up for it.

(c) Agent P

What can I say? It’s like 11 years did not pass. It’s still the same The Dawn that rocks our socks. Jett Pangan still has the best voice among band vocalists in this country. He’s like wine that gets better with age. :razz: I hate bringing out the word “age” because it also reminds me of my own, but can I just say that this band seems to have defied it?

It’s my first time to see them with Sancho on guitars and he certainly jelled well with the group. During my bandstalker days, Sancho was playing for Cynthia Alexander and Loquy, and his main axe was an acoustic guitar. I’ve always been in awe at how he would shred that acoustic as if he’s playing electric. Watching him play electric now is both a new experience and a reminder of how great a musician he is.

(c) Agent P

I had wondered how they were going to do the two-bass-players thing because, I know I sound incredibly ignorant right now, but has there ever been a rock band in the world that has two bass players? The thing that got me hooked on The Dawn way back in the 80s was their bass lines. No, the fact that their bass player was cute has nothing to do with it, although it certainly helped. :blink: Admittedly, one of the reasons why I was hell-bent on attending the 30th anniversary gig was because they brought back Carlos Balcells. And then they also brought back Mon Legaspi, who was my other close buddy in the band when I was still stalking them. That’s two really good reasons not to miss this show.

Because I love 'em bass players. #TheDawnPH #CarlosBalcells #MonLegaspi #PinoyRock #Legends #OPM @thedawnph

A photo posted by Paulette Agent P (@agent_pau) on

I thought they were just going to ‘share’ the set. First up was Carlos; then after a few songs, Mon took over the bass duties while Francis Brew took a break and let Carlos play acoustic guitar for Talaga Naman (Carlos was the original acoustic guitar player on that song).

(c) Agent P

Mon then played bass on the next few songs, until Iisang Bangka came… with both Mon and Carlos on bass. :whoa:

It was sensory overload for me. I was stunned and in awe over the double-bass-player set up that I failed to record the first verse of Bangka. :slaphead: Fortunately, the set up stayed until the end of the show so I was able to record Enveloped Ideas in its entirety.

Their setlist was a mix of classics and new songs; admittedly, it was my first time to hear their songs post-Harapin. :oops: But I enjoyed them, nonetheless. I just wish they had lesser covers and more of their hit songs. Noticeably missing on the list were Love Will Set Us Free (it would’ve been great hearing them play this live with Leni Llapitan on keyboards), Alam Ko, Alam N’yo, Salimpusa (I’d probably die if they played these two songs with two bass players), Beyond The Bend and I Stand With You. I even missed Little Paradise, but for entirely different reasons. :hihihi: I was ecstatic, though, that they opened the set with I Saw You Coming In as it’s one of my biggest faves. It was also nice to hear them play Behind Shadows, which, according to Jett, was only possible because Carlos was with them.

The Dawn - TRENTA

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All in all, it was a great night. It certainly brought out the nostalgia; at the same time it felt good that, as I’ve previously said, it seemed that my eleven-year absence was not felt with this band. Me and my bro were still queueing outside the venue when Mon spotted us from a distance and immediately called us out (and then looked for our other band buddy; dude, I really have no idea where he was that night). And then, the even bigger surprise: we were right there in front, with my brother directly across Jett. But the first one to notice us among the guys onstage was Carlos, whom we haven’t spent that much time with during our years of stalking The Dawn. :shock: It was a total shock that he still remembered us. Of course, Jett acknowledged our presence, too. He always did, and he always does. Nice to see you again, guys. :smile:

Trenta will have a repeat at the Music Museum in November. Catch them if you can. :thumbup: :rakenrol:


Postscript: I guess all that photography training that stemmed from my bandstalking stint has paid off. One of my photos from this gig was used as the accompanying photo for Lea Salonga’s article on Trenta for The Philippine Daily Inquirer. :thumbup:

Super-psyched to see my photo on today's issue of Inquirer. On @msleasalonga 's column, no less! #TheDawn @thedawnph

A photo posted by Paulette Agent P (@agent_pau) on

Salamat at tayo'y nagkasamang muli. 🀘 #TheDawn #trenta #OPM #PinoyRock #Legends @thedawnph @jettjp

A photo posted by Paulette Agent P (@agent_pau) on


Aftermath: Cadbury Joy Ride with Alden Richards
23 September 2016 – UP Ayala Technohub

I was supposed to write about The Dawn’s 30th Anniversary gig, but I guess that has to take a backseat. Again.


I thought this would just be another one of those usual fangirling days. I’d go to an event, take photos, hope that Alden spots me in the crowd… that sort of thing. It did rain, though, which has always been a guaranteed sign for us at Alden International: When it rains, we’ll get an Alden moment. (I wonder how we’re going to manage when dry season comes? Tag-tuyot din sa moment? Wag naman po. :pray: ) I am not ashamed to say that the rain gave me hope that maybe I’ll get more than the usual ‘Ate Pau!’ thing.

I did everything that Cadbury required the attendees to do: I registered at their Facebook page; I arrived early at the venue, lined up and registered my name and cellphone number; I bought the required purchase to be eligible for the Meet and Greet, which I didn’t mind at all because, hello! Cadbury Dairy Milk!

And then I waited some more. Alone.

At 6:41pm, I received the following text message:


My jaw dropped. I wanted to scream and hug someone to share my joy, but I was alone at the time. There were other fans, but they don’t know me – or maybe not – and there’s a slight possibility that some of those who were there hated me with a passion, if they knew that the fat girl that’s hogging the front of the stage was Agent P. :phew: What I did, instead, was to screengrab the SMS and posted it on Facebook. And while I was doing that, my hands were shaking and I was barely able to contain my excitement. :hihihi: Which was totally hilarious, because a meet and greet with Alden Richards is nothing new to me – heck, the latest one was just last Tuesday – yet I was acting as if I’ll be meeting him for the first time. :oops: I think my AI friends can relate, though. We have talked numerous times about how seeing Alden in person always feels like it’s the first time. I think even if we see him every day (which we don’t), the excitement level will always the same.

I had intended to use my Huawei P9+ phone because I wanted to road-test the camera, which was why I positioned myself near the stage so that there’ll be no need for zoom lens. But the Meet and Greet winners were asked to lined up on the side so I had to leave my prized spot. Alden arrived at the venue, and he actually passed in front of me but since I was acting like a total newbie, I totally forgot to take footage. :slaphead: He was quickly covered by the crowd of much taller people some of whom were even standing on chairs. :aargh: Then I remembered that I brought Changi, the 40x zoom camera, with me. I whipped it out and tried to take pics of Alden singing Akin Ka Na Lang.

Operative word: TRIED.


AARGH. :aargh:

While I was trying to stretch-and-tip-toe my way through the crowd, someone tapped my arm. It was Mama Ten. :hihihi:

After one song came the Meet and Greet. The great thing about Cadbury’s Meet and Greet is that (1) they allowed us to use our own cameras/phones; and (2) it was a SOLO pic with Alden. How blessed was I? It’s my first time to win something from this fandom, and I got this one. :cheer: After just a few minutes came my turn for the selfie, and Alden greeted me with…

“Ate Pau, pawis na pawis ka na naman!” (Ate Pau, you’re sweating so much again!)

Ok, not exactly what I was expecting, pero may ‘Ate Pau!’ moment naman so kebs.

I really hate it that I almost always looked like someone dumped a bucket of water over my head whenever Alden sees me. But what can I do when the most perspired part of my body is my head?

So anyway, TMI. :hihihi: Here’s our lovely selfie:



This is my cue to rave about Huawei P9+’s camera. Yep, the one with Leica lenses. I only used the front cam here, and it looked like I took this pic using either GD-TOP (DSLR) or Boojie (mirrorless). :whoa: Imagine what the rear camera can do! I totally did not make a mistake when I got this phone.

After the quick Meet and Greet, Alden has left the building, er, the venue. It took a while before I got off my high from this totally unexpected, yet amazing experience. What am I saying, I’m still feeling high now. Which is why it’s almost 3:00am and I’m still blogging about it.

On my ride home, this was posted on the window beside me:


Pretty much sums up my night. :thumbup:


I really didn’t want to spoil this blog entry by saying something that might ruin it, but I just want to get something off my chest.

Lately, my group has been on the receiving end of nasty snide comments even if we weren’t saying or doing anything controversial, or even substantial. Some people just want to spew and sow hatred on us for reasons known only to them. I get that they always feast on ampalaya on a daily basis and we basically can’t do anything about that, but let me just throw this one out there.

I don’t understand why whenever Alden’s fans express how PROUD and HAPPY we are of his achievements, we had to take crap from some people. I really don’t get it. Bakit parang bawal matuwa para sa kanya?

Nagtatanong lang po.


About two weeks ago, I hibernated from Twitter.

I have been a fangirl for most of my life. I am not new to arguing on the internet; people who knew me from the bandstalker and K-pop era know that too well. I don’t mince words. I say what I want to say. When I choose to get involved on something, I see it through the end.

But this current fandom of mine is different. In my decade-and-a-half experience on social media, this is the first time where people actually wait for whatever I will say, just to pounce on it. They don’t stop even if I stopped.

I went underground not because I can’t defend myself. As far as I’m concerned, I did nothing wrong. I know I did nothing wrong. I also know that what happened to me was brought about by extreme bitterness of my very existence in this fandom and not because they are *concerned* :rolleyes: about the well-being of our supported artist. In order to protect the artist and the group that I’m in, I have to stay quiet.

I brought my Twitter back today to show support for Alden Richards. He’s appearing on Encantadia for the first time, and there’s a Twitter-trending thing that I want to participate in. I got attacked as soon as I posted my first Tweet fresh from hibernation. I got welcomed with more mockery of my existence.

I should be sad. I should be angry. But why should I, when I have this photo from last night’s impromptu gathering with Alden and Alden International that I could look at?

(c)Alden International

They can wallow in their bitterness all they want. I’m happy. We’re happy. Who cares what other people think, say and do? As that Mariah song would say, “they can try, but they can’t take that away from me.”


Two groups managed to escape a zombie horde at the train station. They ended up at the train, in separate cars. One group was safely tucked at the First Class cabin; the rest had to deal with the zombies in other cars.

Somehow, the second group managed to escape the zombie horde and reached the First Class cabin. Unfortunately, one of those from the first group – who turned out to be a big asshole of a CEO – sowed fear from his companions by telling them that there’s no way that anyone from the second group would come out from the zombie horde uninfected. With the zombies right at their tails, those from the second group had to break the door just to escape.

Through the sacrifices made by some of their companions, the survivors from the second group were able to safely gain access to the First Class cabin. However, Mr Asshole CEO was not done yet. He told this lie to the first group: that the one acting as the leader of the second group was infected, and is turning into a zombie right that very moment. Without even checking if that accusation is true, the rest of group 1 hysterically demanded that those from group 2 be evicted from their cabin and have themselves locked at the vestibule. Group 2 silently complied.

The above story was taken from a zombie movie. I could also be talking about real life.

This was the scene that followed: through the fault of one of their own kind, the First Class cabin got compromised. All of group 1 was devoured by the zombies, while those from group 2 who were safely locked at the vestibule survived the attack.

That was how the scene ended in the movie. Would it end the same way in real life?